12/24/19
Okay... So if you are reading this.. Then you know that I have been asking you guys to ask me questions. I also asked you guys what you would like me to write about... And this was a question I got. I thought it would be a nice little short (maybe) blog. I say short... But hopefully it is also impactful and eye opening for those who are thinking about competing. Or really anyone who wants to diet and look better.
Yes... I took things to extreme by competing in bodybuilding. But I feel like with social media these days... Even if you don't get on stage... The pressure is on for all of us to look good... Though we think!
12/26/19
Let's get the show on the road with this blog!!!
No more slacking or procrastinating! Christmas has come and gone in a blink of an eye!
Even though I'm totally leaving my decorations up for a couple more weeks. I put them up late. And I'm not ready to take them down yet. LOL.
Okay... So... If you have followed me along this whole fitness journey... Then you probably know how and why I got started in bodybuilding. If you haven't followed me... Then... Long story short... I thought the girls looked badass! So I wanted to give it a try! If only I really knew what all went into it (physically, mentally, and emotionally).
The first few shows I did... Weren't that bad. Mainly because I don't think I gave it my all. I know my very first show... I cheated on my diet all the time. I thought that if I ate healthy... I could eat extra. Wrong... At least when it comes to contest prep. If you are dieting just to lose some weight... Then that should be fine (within reason).
And after my show... I would put on all the weight I lost within just a couple weeks. But it didn't phase me. I would just go right back to eating healthy, but not too strict. And I didn't freak out about the scale or anything. Went right back to training for fun... And did cardio when I felt like it. It seriously was like nothing really matter. I just did the show... And that was that.
𝕊𝕠 𝕚𝕗 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 𝕨𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕤𝕠 𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕝𝕒𝕟𝕥 ... 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕨𝕙𝕪 𝕕𝕚𝕕 𝕀 𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕡𝕖𝕥𝕖 𝕒𝕥 𝕒𝕝𝕝?
Well, I competed because I liked the fact that I was able to do it. I enjoyed the challenge. And I loved the feeling of accomplishment when I brought a better me to the stage each time! And I just thought it was the coolest thing that I had that much control over my body!
But then something changed when I prepped for the show I earned my pro card at (USA's 2015).
That prep was so hard. Mentally and emotionally... And physically, but I can handle that.
I was eating so little. I was so tired, so hungry. A little grumpy. So skinny. And there were way too many moments where I didn't think I looked good enough.
That wasn't the worst of it though...I made it to my show. I looked the best I had ever looked. And I DID IT! I earned my pro card!!! But then.... When I got back home... I lost all control.
I would eat until I was in physical pain. I would eat just because I simply could. I wouldn't be hungry at all. But I couldn't stop eating. Seriously, who the heck does that? Apparently me... (no judgment if you have done this too)
Long story short (kinda)... I most definitely had really bad disordered eating.
And I am still working on fixing it. Even though I honestly do not think it is something you can fix.
I think it is something that I will live with for the rest of my life. The only thing now... Is that I am in control of it, and myself. It doesn't control me. I am aware of it... And do my best each day to not let it all get to my head.
𝕀 𝕜𝕟𝕠𝕨 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕤𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕤 𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕤𝕙... & 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕕𝕒𝕪𝕤 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕚𝕥 𝕚𝕤 𝕓𝕒𝕕... 𝔹𝕦𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕞𝕠𝕣𝕖 𝕘𝕠𝕠𝕕 𝕕𝕒𝕪𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕨 :)
12/29/19
Okay, guys!!! I thought this blog would be an easy, quick one... But I was wrong!!!
It is actually quite hard for me to write about how bodybuilding has impacted me and my psyche...
Mainly because I don't want to be super repetitive... And I don't want to make bodybuilding seem bad.
𝐼𝓃 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝒽𝑜𝓃𝑒𝓈𝓉𝓎... 𝒜𝓃𝒹 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓉𝑜𝑜 𝓂𝓊𝒸𝒽 𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝓀𝒾𝓃𝑔...
Bodybuilding and the extreme lifestyle has messed with me mentally and emotionally.
For a girl... Who has had body image "issues" and disordered eating/negative relationship with food... Bodybuilding definitely didn't help. But I wouldn't change the fact that I have competed. And I wouldn't tell others to NOT compete.... I would just do my best to inform them about what all goes into the sport. I would help them be in the best spot possible (physically, mentally, and emotionally) before beginning a prep.
Bodybuilding has its negatives... But it also has amazing positives too!!!
It taught me that I literally can do anything I set my mind to!!! Put in the work. Be stronger than your excuses! And you can do great things.
It taught me amazing discipline!!! I was seriously like a robot when I started prepping for pro shows.
I woke up around 3:40am.. Did my cardio. Ate my breakfast. Went to work for 12 hours. Went straight to the gym after work. Went home to do my second session of cardio (if the gym I was at didn't have cardio equipment). Ate my last meal. Showered. Went to bed. Then did it all over again. When I think about that time... I have no idea how I did it! Well, I do! I had a goal to bring my best to the stage... So I did what coach said to!
Bodybuilding has allowed me to meet some amazing people!!! So many people say that bodybuilders are mean/rude... But I have met some of the most kind humans back stage!!! I guess when you are butt naked standing in front of fans, trying to dry your tan... You have no choice but to be nice to the girl next to you doing the same. Lol.
And even though my body image issues became worse because my idea of what I needed to be was skewed... Bodybuilding helped me become aware of it. if things didn't get worse... Idk if they would have ever gotten better. Simply because I don't think I would have ever taken the time to realize there was an issue.
I can say the same thing with my disordered eating... If I didn't start bodybuilding... I would have never learned how to eat... And about nutrition... And how to eat to change your body according to your goals. And how to eat to perform better in the gym and in life (powerlifting taught me more about this too). And if I didn't learn how to eat... And take it all to the extreme... I would have kept pushing my disordered eating to the side... & never dealing with the issue.
So in the end... I feel like even the negative things that bodybuilding has brought into my life... Are positive. I also think those things were already a part of my life... Bodybuilding just brought them into the light.
*sigh* Let's end this here.
If you read it... As always... THANK YOU!
AND... If you are looking into competing in bodybuilding or just want to get super lean for a photoshoot or something.. I am here to help. I can help you prepare for the diet. I can help you with the actual diet. Then I can help you come out of the diet :)
HAVE A GREAT SUNDAY! (or whatever day you are reading this, lol)