4/10/20
Happy Friday, Everyone!!!
I hope you have all had an amazing and productive day!!!
I on the other hand feel like I didn't do much of anything. Just busy work.
-Emails
-Cardio
-Baking
-Laundry
-More emails
-A little bit of reading (should have been more)
On the bright side... I did take some time to look through some of my photo albums. And I took some pics of the pics and sent them to my friends & family. It was nice to reminisce a little and chat with some of my favorite people about the memories ♡
4/11/20
GOOD MORNING! Rise & Shine my lovelies!!!
So... I journaled in my private journal today... And it was actually perfect for this blog. I wrote about how I feel like a fat cow. And how I feel like I have lost all discipline and willpower with my diet... I also wrote about how I wanted to get back down to the high 120's for bodyweight. But then I thought...
I remember being that weight. I remember being even lighter. And guess what... I still didn't like the way I looked. I still thought I wasn't lean enough, muscular enough, vascular enough. WTF?! There is no winning with this game. So what do I do?
I'm going to try to take the "dieting" and bodyweight somewhat out of my list of goals. I say somewhat because what I want to accomplish as an athlete will still include them both. But they are most definitely not my actual goal. They will just help me reach my goal and be BETTER!
So the big question is... CAN I EVER DIET AGAIN???
I know that I can... Mainly because I have felt/thought this before... Pretty much every off season... When I get to eat more food, have some treats here and there... I always question whether or not I will be able to stop eating. LOL. And be okay with being starving pretty much all the time.
YES! I have done it in the past and I will do it again!!!
4/12/20
HAPPY EASTER!!!!
This still isn't going to be about whether or not I can diet... But I wanted to take a moment to write about Easter.. Or holidays in general.. And family. If you don't know me... Family is huge for me! And little holidays like this (especially big holidays) are a little hard for me... I really miss being with them. This is the fifth Easter I haven't been with my family. It may sound silly, but I miss the Easter Egg Hunt with all the kids. I know everyone is growing up, and probably getting too old for that. But I don't care. So if any of my family members read this... Just know that I love & miss you bunches!
Okay... Now let's talk about whether or not I can ever diet again!
Like I said above... I've done it in the past and I will do it again. Okay, the end!
Haha! Just kidding!!!!
di·et
/ˈdīət/
verb
Restrict oneself to small amounts or special kinds of food in order to lose weight.
"it's difficult to diet"
Pretty much since I decided I wanted to be a bodybuilder I have been on a diet. Until last year. But that took A LOT of work to get out of the mindset to diet ALL THE DAMN TIME!!
I dieted to get ready for my shows. I dieted after my shows because I would eat like an asshole and have a terrible rebound... So I had to do damage control my entire off-season. And after a few months of not liking the way I looked... I would hop right back into prep. Without allowing myself to get my calories up, cardio down, and hormones back in check.
Finally after my last show (October 20, 2018) Tony helped me reverse diet properly. And it was amazing. Everything was on point! We were able to get my food up to 2700-2800 CLEAN CALORIES. With a cheat meal maybe every two weeks. I didn't really need one. I was pretty satisfied with my food! We brought my cardio down... and I got blood work done a month after my show, and everything was good! Yay!!
But, I forgot to mention... I was weighing out EVERYTHING!!! I was following my macros to the T! Yes, my food intake was going up... But I still had to weigh out Reduced Sugar Ketchup. It was still a diet... Just a different kind (reverse diet). And I eventually broke.
March 2019... I was in Tampa for a mini vacation... And I had a bit of a meltdown! I just wanted to eat!!! And not have to weigh it out. So that is when another journey began for me... The NO DIET journey.
4/16/20
I apologize for taking a little longer to write this blog. But I’m sure you don’t mind. You have your own stuff you are doing. Perhaps doing a home workout I have posted :)
Let’s touch on my NO DIET journey…
Starting March 2019… I was in Tampa, Florida. I feel like vacation is NOT the time to try to diet. But of course… I decide that I want to start contest prep. I had gotten my calories up to 2700-2800. I was doing very little cardio… And I was about as “fat” as I wanted to get. Hahahaha. I wish I was that kind of “fat” now. I weighed 125-126 pounds (I am now about 142-143 pounds).
After I had a mini meltdown about not wanted to weigh out my ketchup anymore… I definitely enjoyed myself a little bit while I was out there. I don’t think I went overboard though. BUT.. A month later I went to Ohio for the eliteFTS summit.
Needless to say… I probably went overboard there with food. I tried to eat “good” … But man! When Tony and I went out… We just about ordered everything on the menu. And best believe WE ATE IT!!! The two of us can do major damage when it comes to food. That’s why 98% of the time we just stick to our macros and our own food.
It is a major struggle to just eat one cookie. Like seriously… Who just eats one or two Oreos?! Especially when you live such an extreme lifestyle like the one I HAVE CHOSEN. Always on… So when you go off… You go way off. The thought is… Well, I already messed up my diet for the day, might as well enjoy it & get back on track tomorrow. Ha. Not the best mindset towards eating. But that’s what it was for the longest time.
So of course… After enjoying LOTS of food. I was weighing closer to 130 pounds (again, it would be nice to be back there. HA). I wasn’t liking the way I looked at all. And I had so much guilt from eating off plan. So what do I do? I hire a coach.
WHAT THE HECK?! Who hires a coach when they are NOT ready to diet? Who hires a coach when they still have more vacation/work travel ahead? Yeah, apparently I DO!!! And oh man!!! I struggled bad!
I think, May 2019 I was back in Tampa for the Exercise Execution Camp at Mi40. & trying to diet when the person you are traveling with is eating whatever they want… THAT SHIT IS NO FUN! AT ALL! I most definitely cried a few times in the bathroom. I did eventually give in. I didn’t want to ruin my trip because I wanted to try to diet. So I at a little hear and there.
And a few weeks later I ended up pausing things with my coach. Told him I was having some issues with my stomach, which I was… I couldn’t stop putting food in it! LOL. So I will continue to work with him at another time. Probably when I decide to actually prep for a show again.
Now it was probably June or July… I just had to accept that I wasn’t able to diet. I had to accept my weight gain. And had to move on with my life. Why stress over all this? I wasn’t taking control and making the necessary changes.. So that is my fault. At least if I’m going to choose to eat so much.. I might as well enjoy it! Not feel guilty! That takes the fun out of it all!
So I decided to refocus my energy onto training for my first Strongman Competition. Might as well put my new weight to use! And it was a blast!!! I focused on getting strong and training hard for something I’ve never tried before!!! It some pressure off since I didn’t have anything to compare to. I just did my best.
After my Strongman Competition… I decided that I was also going to do another powerlifting meet with Tony. I signed up for the 132 weight class. I normally do the 123 weight class, but I was weighing about 140 at that time… So I figured if I got my eating in check… 132 would be good without losing strength.
4/17/20
So, I am currently sitting in my parents' living room. This has been one heck of a week. But I promise I will finish this blog. LOL.
Where did I leave off?
I trained hard for my powerlifting meet. And I got my eating in check. I weighed in at 129 for my meet! Yay!!! So... How did I do it? Did I diet??
Yes... I did diet. It wasn't a bodybuilding diet. It was more like a flexible diet. I didn't set macros. I just had a minimum protein I needed to hit each day & calories that I needed to stay within. Then I pretty much ate whatever I wanted. & it worked!
I never thought I could do flexible dieting! But I did it. Is it something I would do for a bodybuilding show? No. But it worked great for a powerlifting meet.
4/20/20
Happy Monday, Everyone!
I am back home, and somewhat back in my routine. Things have been a bit chaotic emotionally... So that has thrown stuff off a bit. But I am working on being present. Seeing the good in things. Learning from each experience... And just working on being BETTER!
I'm sorry this blog hasn't really been the best when it comes to the actual topic.
CAN I EVER DIET AGAIN?!
Yes I can! And yes you can!
But keep in mind... Dieting is temporary. So yes, I will diet for a bodybuilding show, because eventually the show will come and go... And my diet will be over. Yes, I will diet to make weight for a powerlifting meet. That too will come and go, and my diet will be over.
But I think most of us want to change our lifestyle. Most of us want to lose some weight and stay there. Most of us want to look and feel better for the rest of our life. THAT IS NOT TEMPORARY!!!
So yes, diet down to your whatever your goal is. And please do not rush it! Do not try to make this a quick fix. It took years and years to get to where you currently are... So give yourself time to get to where you want to be. The more time you give yourself to diet.... The more good habits you will create, the more muscle you will be able to maintain... And the more likely you are going to keep the weight off. No crash diets here!!!
Then after you reach your goal weight... Continue on with the new healthy habits you have created. Continue to eat good, quality foods... Just slowly start to increase them.
Oh and!!! I forgot to mention... If you are dieting for just life... Do not cut out treats. Keep in mind that no food is actually bad. It is only bad when you over eat it. If you are dieting for life... You aren't going to go FOREVER without eating a cookie again... So don't cut it our during the dieting process... Just be mindful about it. Make that cookie fit into your macros or diet. Just eat one cookie versus 10. This is all a huge part of the learning new habits process. & I am here to help you with it all!!!
Continue on with your activity/exercise routine. Hopefully by now, it is just a normal part of your day :)
Continue drinking your water.
Just continue it all. This is the new lifestyle you have created.
& like I mentioned above... This doesn't mean you can't eat cookies and ice cream. You most certainly can. Just be mindful and don't over eat.
To wrap this up... Yes I can diet again... & I will. But right now... I am just going to make sure I hit my protein, stay within my calories, stay active, train hard, fuel my body to feel & perform good... & enjoy a treat here and there.
That's it for now, guys!!! I will be starting a new blog in a couple days!!!
What do you want me to write about???